Gofundme for new underwear

I had never heard of gofundme .  Then a woman posted on Facebook that she  had started a gofundme site to raise money to pay for her electric bill, which was now  3000 dollars.  And her service had been cut off.

I went to her site and read all about it.  She currently has raised zero dollars.  Hard to understand.  Just because she ran her AC 24 hours a day for six months and custom  heated her kitty houses, she should still  be cut a break.

I think somebody, like US, who are writers! should volunteer to rewrite her bio.  I am sure we can find a way to elicit some sympathy and crank up the cash machine.

I need gofundme  Really, really do.

As you can see, my skivvies are disgusting.  Tattered threads. The underwear equivalent of Valley Forge footwear.  And the colors?  Don’t go there, baby.

Perhaps the following bio-

Tally ho! No longer allowed at the Harvard Club in Manhattan because I have exposed my third world undies while using the urinals.  Nigel and the other members have complained, and my pass has been taken away.  Won’t you help?  Simply include your bank routing and checking account number in the space  provided and a dollar amount that would pay for a four pack of tires for your Bentley.  

Or hey, how about my friend Little John’s shoes?  Perhaps he, or WE, could write the following-

What hey!  Little John here.  Have you seen the condition of my Bruno Magli loafers?  Disgraceful.  My women and I went to  the Four Seasons and we were shuffled off to a table  near the kitchen!

Please be so compassionate as to drop a 50 spot on my gofundme site and I will go about the business of buying the latest and best men’s shoes.  I will post a picture after the  acquisition is complete!

I can see a wonderful future with this site! Won’t you help?

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