Deja

Deja..

Could there be a prettier name?

Deja is my new cleaning lady.

“Deja…pretty name, so ur Mom was a hippy?”, says I.

” Uh, yes a Deadhead…how did you know?”

Puhh…leeeze

Deja assesses my colossal pile of shit.

And determines that it will cost me 500 bags of golden pezuzas.

Now, Deja, as per her name…she be sweet, which might lead the piggiest of u to think I want to do the George Costanza inspired honey badger dance with her.

This be true..
but met her hub, and he biker like tattoo dude.

Keep el zippo in the up position.

Deja goes home and brings a FUCKING shop vac.

How embarrassing.

Took her 7 hours to clean three rooms.

Hoist gold bags into her car, offer her a drink, and perhaps a back rub.

She chugs Mad Dog, stares at my donut like bod, and takes a pass on the rub.

She will be back in 3 weeks.
Will get sleek, purchase hairy chest, and gold chains.

Then… maybe

Just maybe..

Will get more cleaned than carpets.

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