My dad and Marie Osmond

I’m riding the bike at the Y and watching the TV overhead. Marie Osmond comes on for a weight loss company.

Damn, she looks good. Extremely pretty.

Gotta be in her fifties.

Takes me back a good 25 years, when my dad was alive. I was sitting with him on his porch and he turns to me and says, ” Do you know Marie Osmond?”

“Sure.”

He proceeds to carry on for what seems like forever about how wonderful, gorgeous, sexy, and personable Marie Osmond is. He NEVER misses her show.

At the time, he is about 80 years old, and I have never heard him carry on like this.  Never a word about any female, ever.

To be truthful, it weirded me out a little bit. I mean, my dad had a secret, smoldering, crush, and it wasn’t my mom.

Now did my dad have his bags packed for Hollywood? No.

Was mom losing sleep over the risk of Marie taking her man of over 50 years? No again.

But I had the gnawing feeling that IF Marie pulled up in the driveway and curled her finger at Dad, he would become her geriatric love slave.

So seeing Marie on the TV last week got me to thinking about how she almost became my stepmom.

So what about me?

Any  Marie Hollywood crushes in my background?

None. Not Hollywood types anyway. Don’t do a thing for me.

I’ll take the local librarian or the Staples sales girl.

Go figure.

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